...getting back to basics
...my wonderful job
...my darling house
...my dear, dear friend and sponsor, without whom I might forget to breathe
...my dear, dear friend who was by my side Saturday night
...the movie Labyrinth (for thorough understanding of why, please watch this clip until the end. Thank you!)
...green tea
...taking it easy
...the upcoming Containerscape project that will challenge me and make me lots of money
...my "active" monkey (who happens to still be sleeping because of Spring Break, but I'm referring to all of the activities she's been participating in, while still maintaining straight A status).
...being me
Easy Does It
Monday, March 15, 2010
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Today I am grateful for...
...taking the day off from working so hard on myself
...just being instead of doing doing doing
...neutrality - gray is soft, easy, peaceful
...the grace through which I have experienced the eight worldly dharmas over the past several days
...contentment that arises from living, just today, beyond them
...truth
...walking in the light of love
...just being instead of doing doing doing
...neutrality - gray is soft, easy, peaceful
...the grace through which I have experienced the eight worldly dharmas over the past several days
...contentment that arises from living, just today, beyond them
...truth
...walking in the light of love
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Today I am grateful for...
...kindness. Spending the day sitting with unkind things I have done that hurt my loved ones wore me out and left me entirely ready to ask God to help me be more open and considerate of others and their feelings.
...forgiveness. I can't expect it from everyone I have wronged, but I can forgive myself.
...learning from my mistakes. Sometimes life's lessons are painful, however I don't have to learn them over and over and over if I choose to do things differently next time.
...Corey Haim. Rest his poor, tortured soul. Oddly, word of his death got the peculiar ball rolling for me today that enabled me to see some things from a different perspective. Weird, huh?
...my fiddle-playing monkey. Enjoyed a lovely evening with good friends, family, Handel and cookies.
...my mom who was kind of enough to bring me the sweetest colorful chunky Kim-like bracelet.
...bed. It beckons me.
Let there be peace on Earth, and let it begin with me.
...forgiveness. I can't expect it from everyone I have wronged, but I can forgive myself.
...learning from my mistakes. Sometimes life's lessons are painful, however I don't have to learn them over and over and over if I choose to do things differently next time.
...Corey Haim. Rest his poor, tortured soul. Oddly, word of his death got the peculiar ball rolling for me today that enabled me to see some things from a different perspective. Weird, huh?
...my fiddle-playing monkey. Enjoyed a lovely evening with good friends, family, Handel and cookies.
...my mom who was kind of enough to bring me the sweetest colorful chunky Kim-like bracelet.
...bed. It beckons me.
Let there be peace on Earth, and let it begin with me.
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Today I am also grateful for...
...Sustainers. I'll just leave it at that. And I will pray for them. ;)
...the fine people at Jiffy. It's almost a crime that such delicious corn bread only costs 50 cent.
...the fine people at Jiffy. It's almost a crime that such delicious corn bread only costs 50 cent.
Today I am grateful for...
...waking up entirely ready for God to remove my codependecy. It's too much work to be so clingy, needy and full of self-pity.
...self-sufficiency, self-love, self-worth all seem to be easier alternatives today.
...Melody Beatty. Couldn't have gotten through the last few weeks without her. Hmmmmm...might that have something to do with this readiness, I wonder?
...Saying what I mean, and meaning what I say. If i don't know myself for sure, I won't say anything until I figure it out.
...my friends. Especially ones who watch House and listen to Leonard Cohen. You know who you are. Could definitely not have gotten through the last few weeks as successfully without you!
...Henry breaking up with me. I know, right? I actually mean it. My Higher Power, through others, can do for me what I can't do for myself, even if I know I need to and it would be the best thing for me.
...being alone sometimes. I no longer need to keep myself overbooked with activities to distract me from the fact that I am alone. I like being alone and doing whatever I want. I like being me. I like the stuff I like. I often agree with me. I like the same music as me. It's really the best relationship I've ever been in. I have so much in common with myself.
...self-sufficiency, self-love, self-worth all seem to be easier alternatives today.
...Melody Beatty. Couldn't have gotten through the last few weeks without her. Hmmmmm...might that have something to do with this readiness, I wonder?
...Saying what I mean, and meaning what I say. If i don't know myself for sure, I won't say anything until I figure it out.
...my friends. Especially ones who watch House and listen to Leonard Cohen. You know who you are. Could definitely not have gotten through the last few weeks as successfully without you!
...Henry breaking up with me. I know, right? I actually mean it. My Higher Power, through others, can do for me what I can't do for myself, even if I know I need to and it would be the best thing for me.
...being alone sometimes. I no longer need to keep myself overbooked with activities to distract me from the fact that I am alone. I like being alone and doing whatever I want. I like being me. I like the stuff I like. I often agree with me. I like the same music as me. It's really the best relationship I've ever been in. I have so much in common with myself.
Monday, March 8, 2010
Today I am grateful for...
• self-righteousness is a tool I have used to justify my behavior and my decisions, many of which have turned out to be the “right” thing for me. Yet today, I see that I do not have to convince anyone else of how right I may be or how wrong they are, so I am entirely ready for God to remove this self-righteous thinking to make room for the quiet compassion that can’t always find its way to the surface.
• eloquence and articulation have enabled me to “explain” the same thing over and over and over again, hoping that eventually the person I am speaking to will see it my way and come around to my way of thinking.
• humility is how I determine and promptly admit when self-righteousness begins to creep back in.
• wisdom to know the difference between God’s will and my will, as well as the difference between humility and humiliation. I do not have to lose any part of my true self to achieve the former.
• Al-Anon slogans – such as “Listen and Learn” which I will apply today to remind myself that I do not have all the answers.
• Faeries keep me humble by providing me with all kinds of little surprises as reminders of just how human I am, and how important it is to just roll with this life I am privileged to know.
• eloquence and articulation have enabled me to “explain” the same thing over and over and over again, hoping that eventually the person I am speaking to will see it my way and come around to my way of thinking.
• humility is how I determine and promptly admit when self-righteousness begins to creep back in.
• wisdom to know the difference between God’s will and my will, as well as the difference between humility and humiliation. I do not have to lose any part of my true self to achieve the former.
• Al-Anon slogans – such as “Listen and Learn” which I will apply today to remind myself that I do not have all the answers.
• Faeries keep me humble by providing me with all kinds of little surprises as reminders of just how human I am, and how important it is to just roll with this life I am privileged to know.
Sunday, March 7, 2010
Today I am grateful for...
...childishness. Seeing the world through the eyes of a child can be liberating. But behaving like one can be limiting, so I am entirely ready to stop acting like a big fat baby when I don't get my way.
...maturity. Now that I have seen that I can be responsible, reliable and consistent, I can start acting like a grown-up and still retain certain childlike values such as trust and silly dancing (fart jokes to be assessed on a case-by-case basis).
...the movie Say Anything. While today in church I was treated to an appropriately moving rendition of "The Greatest Love of All", allowing me to honor the child in me, if the song is going to be stuck in my head all day, I'd like the option to defer to Joe's acapella version from the graduation ceremony.
...the Al-Anon Promises. "We will become mature, responsible individuals with a great capacity for joy, wonder and fulfillment." AHA! The best of all worlds, yes?
...maturity. Now that I have seen that I can be responsible, reliable and consistent, I can start acting like a grown-up and still retain certain childlike values such as trust and silly dancing (fart jokes to be assessed on a case-by-case basis).
...the movie Say Anything. While today in church I was treated to an appropriately moving rendition of "The Greatest Love of All", allowing me to honor the child in me, if the song is going to be stuck in my head all day, I'd like the option to defer to Joe's acapella version from the graduation ceremony.
...the Al-Anon Promises. "We will become mature, responsible individuals with a great capacity for joy, wonder and fulfillment." AHA! The best of all worlds, yes?
Yesterday I was grateful for...
...fear. Again. It's a complex one, huh? I am entirely ready to have God remove my fear of the unknown, my fear of rejection, and my fear of failure.
...rejection. If I feel insecure or frightened, I will remember that my fear is a signal that there is something for me to learn.
...failure. Even when my position is hopeless and God urges me to take a risk, I often hesitate, hoping for a miracle. I will remember that the miracle is already within me.
...courage. It takes courage to step beyond what is comfortable, predictable and known. I would like some of that, please.
"Courage is fear that has said its prayers."
...rejection. If I feel insecure or frightened, I will remember that my fear is a signal that there is something for me to learn.
...failure. Even when my position is hopeless and God urges me to take a risk, I often hesitate, hoping for a miracle. I will remember that the miracle is already within me.
...courage. It takes courage to step beyond what is comfortable, predictable and known. I would like some of that, please.
"Courage is fear that has said its prayers."
Friday, March 5, 2010
Today I am grateful for...
...fear
...courage
...hope
...faith
...Zen proverbs - If you understand, things are just as they are; if you do not understand, things are just as they are.
I have all kinds of great thoughts in my head about fear of the unknown, and courage not being the absence of fear but rather the strength to face what you're afraid of, and that I know I cannot ask God to remove my fear completely, but I am too busy to make it sound pretty right now. For that, I am also grateful.
Namaste, y'all!
...courage
...hope
...faith
...Zen proverbs - If you understand, things are just as they are; if you do not understand, things are just as they are.
I have all kinds of great thoughts in my head about fear of the unknown, and courage not being the absence of fear but rather the strength to face what you're afraid of, and that I know I cannot ask God to remove my fear completely, but I am too busy to make it sound pretty right now. For that, I am also grateful.
Namaste, y'all!
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Today I am grateful for...
• Controlling, manipulative behavior – that I thought would get me what I wanted. It’s good to try things so when they don’t work, I can cross them off the list of potential reasonable solutions and move on. Since I am powerless over so many things, I am entirely ready for God to take back control of all that I have been struggling with trying to change by myself.
• Focusing on me – and the things I can control, or change, such as my actions and my behavior and, to some extent, my negative thought processes.
• Cooperation – is one of the many choices I have as an alternative to manipulation. Susan did not make cupcakes in an attempt to make Mr. Hooper to love her, nor did she complain about having to set the table all by herself until someone offered to do it for her.
• Letting go and letting God – takes less time and energy than trying to control other people, especially their thoughts and feelings. For me, at least. (And Drew Barrymore’s dad in Firestarter…nosebleed at 55 seconds into the clip…and again at 3:15…who needs that?)
• Cupcakes – especially little chocolatey goo-filled ones that some Junior League committee left for us to enjoy this morning for breakfast AND, more importantly these tiny little cake stands that I saw at the Curious Sofa last night.
• Focusing on me – and the things I can control, or change, such as my actions and my behavior and, to some extent, my negative thought processes.
• Cooperation – is one of the many choices I have as an alternative to manipulation. Susan did not make cupcakes in an attempt to make Mr. Hooper to love her, nor did she complain about having to set the table all by herself until someone offered to do it for her.
• Letting go and letting God – takes less time and energy than trying to control other people, especially their thoughts and feelings. For me, at least. (And Drew Barrymore’s dad in Firestarter…nosebleed at 55 seconds into the clip…and again at 3:15…who needs that?)
• Cupcakes – especially little chocolatey goo-filled ones that some Junior League committee left for us to enjoy this morning for breakfast AND, more importantly these tiny little cake stands that I saw at the Curious Sofa last night.
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Today I am grateful for...
• judgment – not as in “using good judgment” but rather, my inclination to unfairly judge others and myself. Created by me as an excellent defense mechanism, it now makes me feel icky, therefore I am entirely ready for God to remove my instinct to be so judgmental.
• apple seeds – some people leave them in the sink, some people rinse them out. Who am I to say which of us is better for it?
• living and letting live – which not only works in reference to people, but cats with eating disorders and barking dogs, too.
• acceptance – if God sees fit, I hope that God will fill up the formerly judgey bits of me with tolerance and patience and genuine acceptance of as many people, places and things as I can stand.
• Axl Rose – for providing me a second version of Paul McCartney’s “Live and Let Die” to loop through my head after typing that little slogan above.
• apple seeds – some people leave them in the sink, some people rinse them out. Who am I to say which of us is better for it?
• living and letting live – which not only works in reference to people, but cats with eating disorders and barking dogs, too.
• acceptance – if God sees fit, I hope that God will fill up the formerly judgey bits of me with tolerance and patience and genuine acceptance of as many people, places and things as I can stand.
• Axl Rose – for providing me a second version of Paul McCartney’s “Live and Let Die” to loop through my head after typing that little slogan above.
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Today I am grateful for...
- anger - "Really?", you ask. Yes, I say. My anger has served me well over the years, as a coping skill, a motivator, a means of survival. However, today, I am entirely ready to have God remove my anger, so I prepare to bid it farewell.
- God - who can take this anger from me, and who wants more for me than mere survival.
- serenity - "Undergarments?", you ask. Don't be a smartass, I say. If it is God's will, I would prefer to be serene, rather than angry.
- sunshine - "Why, weren't you just last week angry at the sunshine?", you ask. Yes, I say, I was.
Monday, March 1, 2010
Today I am grateful for...
- the promise of Spring (narcissus, anyone?)
- Unity Temple on the Plaza
- Outlook reminders
- acceptance
- assorted upcoming performing arts events (this weekend: Wylliams/Henry Contemporary Dance Company "On the Edge", The Warriors at Screenland Crossroads, Evil Dead the Musical, just to name a few)
- today
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